audience: nikkari

[tricycles]

i asked andie for a shitpost and this is what i got

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week one, thursday.

[tricycles]

[The next time Nikkari walks through a door, he'll find himself tripping and falling into an entirely new location. Specifically — an empty hospital wing, devoid of all signs of life save for the steady beeping of a heart monitor in the distance. It looks like the only way to go is down the corridor, but Nikkari won't have to walk for too long before he stumbles across the only open room in the entire hallway.

... In fact, he won't even have to go in. Carlos is waiting for him right outside of the room. He lifts a hand in greeting once he sees him.]

Hey. It's good to see you again.

[uncleanse]

[ nikkari, surprisingly, finds himself easily keeping his balance when he steps out of the casino and into the hospital. it's happened to him enough times that it doesn't really faze him anymore? like, sure, anything can happen here, he's just gonna roll with it. ]

You know, I'm not sure if it's a good or bad thing that I'm getting used to that.

[ he shakes his head with a little dismissive laugh, before turning his attention to carlos and lightheartedly returning the greeting. ]

You as well, Carlos-san. How has life on the other side been?

[tricycles]

[Nikkari's grown too powerful from NPC dick and pussy. Bless his thotty little heart.

Carlos smiles at him, though. Hi. Hello. Good to see he didn't trip and fall while getting shifted to wherever this is? Nice.]

Honestly, pretty boring. [It's him and Polly, Nikkari. It's not great.] I've really missed you guys.

[uncleanse]

[ aw... he offers carlos a smile at that, because as much as he personally likes polly... yeah, that's fair... ]

Haha... would you like me to make a habit of visiting more frequently, then? I've always been closer than most to the realm beyond, after all.

[tricycles]

Heh, I wouldn't be opposed to that. Just make you take care of your business on the other side first.

[Get your thotting in before you go visit your ghost hosts, Nikkari. As thirsty as Carlos is for talking to someone that isn't Polly... yeah.]

[uncleanse]

Carlos-san. Are you implying that I'd go a full week without sharing a bed with someone?

[ HIM? OF ALL PEOPLE? ]

[tricycles]

I'm just saying, stay safe. I don't want anyone dying if it can be avoided.

[LIVE YOUR BEST HO LIFE NIKKARI??? Let him live.]

week two, thursday.

[tricycles]

[Back to the hospital! Carlos is waiting for him in the hallway, a little bit away from the only open room this time. The heart monitor is still beep, beep, beeping away.]

Got your message. What's up?

[uncleanse]

Haha... can't I just drop by to say hello?

[ of course there's a reason he's here, but also. he's nikkari. this is business as usual. ]

[tricycles]

You can. But most people don't request a meeting just to say hello nowadays.

[uncleanse]

Fair, fair.

[ he chuckles as he leans against a wall, demeanor extremely casual. ]

I've been wondering... what do you and the other three hosts do while you aren't visiting with one of us?

[tricycles]

Working. We said we'd look into ways to get out of this mess, remember?

[uncleanse]

I do, which is why I'm curious. Working can mean many things, you know?

week three, monday.

[tricycles]

[Well. Nikkari isn't going to get pulled anywhere today. But the next time he rounds a corner, he'll find himself coming face to face with some beef. Which is to say— Carlos is going to be right there. Surprise! Here's to hoping Nikkari catches himself before he trips into him?]

Hey. You asked for a meeting, right?

[uncleanse]

[ nikkari isn't expecting The Goods to suddenly run into him, literally, that he bumps into carlos's chest and loses the PUSSY glasses as they clatter to the ground. ]

—You know, that throws me off much more than the times where I'm the one suddenly switching locations.

[tricycles]

[RIP, PUSSY... Carlos is reaching out to steady him just in case, placing a hand on his shoulder. Sorry he made you drop your pussy, bro.]

Whoa— My bad. I just thought I'd... switch it up this week. You alright?

[uncleanse]

[ AT LEAST THEY'RE NOT BROKEN... PUSSY LIVES ON ]

I'm fine, just a little surprised. [ he laughs, patting the hand carlos has on his shoulder. ] How are the newly deceased taking to their new home?

[tricycles]

As long as you're sure...

[PUSSY LIVES ON...! He'll pull his hand away one Nikkari is done patting it.]

They're okay. I wasn't lying when I told you guys the other side was safe.

[uncleanse]

Mm, I heard as much from Prompto-san last week. [ he smiles. ] Do you think I would have asked so lightheartedly if I wasn't aware of that?

week five, sunday.

[tricycles]

[Once again, to the hospital he goes! Carlos is in the hallway, staring at his right wrist while he waits for him to show up. He'll glance in his direction once he hears his footsteps.]

It's been a while. Welcome back.

[uncleanse]

Mm, it's been a busy few weeks, as I'm sure you've noticed.

[ as he approaches, he glances at carlos's wrist, where i assume his watch is... ]

What are you looking at?

[tricycles]

[Wrong arm! But he's never had his watch anyway because, uh, canonpoints.]

Nothing. [Showing him his wrist, and then shrugging.] I know, I've been keeping an eye on things. You guys have been working hard.

[uncleanse]

[ in my defense i still have only played 999 so i don't know shit leave me alone ]

It must be rather lively on that side, by now... perhaps more so than ours?

[tricycles]

[... He drops his arm, frowning.]

Don't take this the wrong way, but I preferred it when it was just Polly and I on the other side.

[uncleanse]

Ah . . . a little too lively for your tastes, then?